For The Ladies: A Single Guy Speaks

I woke up this morning and had this kind of thought on my mind with the blog. The book I’m reading is great and the questions coming from it are excellent. It just gets me thinking more on the topic as well as my own personal desires. If there is an area that does sadden me in this, it’s how women treat themselves.

I haven’t been shy in this thread in saying I do love the beauty of the ladies. There would be a lot of problems if I didn’t. However, I also do realize that the ladies love their own beauty as well. Every female desires to be beautiful. She desires to shine. She wants people to see her and be in awe.

The problem is, I see a lot of beautiful women who don’t know they’re beautiful.

I ponder that a lot of it is from the media today. The media has presented the image of a supermodel as what a girl is to aspire to. Now there are some beautiful women in the public eye, no doubt. That is not because they are in the public eye though, but that is because they are women. They would be beautiful even if they weren’t on TV or doing concerts or in the movies.

Yet too many a young lady believes that she has to look just like X in order to be beautiful. If guys aren’t falling over her everyday, then she’s not beautiful. If she doesn’t have just the right proportions or the right weight or the right figure or the right clothes or the right accessories, then she’s not beautiful.

Of course, I’m not against a girl taking care of her appearance. A girl should do what she can to look lovely before the world. I’m against two things in particular. I’m against a girl thinking that that’s all that she is. I’m also against girls being beautiful and either explicitly or implicitly denying it.

The first one I see in the girls that buy these girly magazines that are far more adult in nature than they should be. If you don’t know which ones I’m talking about, then go to the local department and/or grocery store and look in the check-out section and it won’t take long for you to find out.

Ladies. If you think true beauty will come in what you add to yourself, you’re mistaken. Accessories and clothing do not give you beauty. They can enhance the beauty you already possess. If a guy doesn’t think you’re worth it until he can sleep with you also, well rest assured, that’s not a guy you need to be talking to.

So now we get to the second one and this one saddens me the most. I meet several women who are beautiful and they don’t see it. Instead, they are complaining about their appearance and I and several other guys I know are wondering “Have you looked in a mirror and seen yourself lately?”

There’s a secret most guys are aware of that most ladies don’t seem to be. The girls that consider themselves “plain” are usually the most beautiful ones of all. The ones that consider themselves the most beautiful, are usually the most unattractive ones of all. It has more to do with the inner beauty.

And believe it or not ladies, many a guy can see that.

A good guy is one that already thinks you look great as you are. If you show up for a date and your hair isn’t perfect, he won’t pitch a fit. He’ll just be thrilled he gets to be with you anyway. He’ll also be one that will respect the boundaries that he ought to respect concerning you physically.

Of course, a guy is always thinking that way, but he can do so respectfully. The guy already desires you or else he wouldn’t be going out with you. However, the good guy will control his desires instead of letting his desires control him. Having desire is not our problem today. It never has been. The problem has been our desires having us.

Naturally, he will be tempted. That means that he will have to be strong of course, but so will you. Anyone in a relationship who thinks they won’t be tempted is already on the path of falling entirely. One of my rules for dating is that I don’t allow myself to be alone with a girl at either my place or hers. That is opening the door wide. I have no intentions of letting a girl in here even if my roommate is with me. The only exception would be if we had a group event such as a Sunday School party or something of that sort. Other than that, there’s no need for unnecessary temptation.

One thing would delight me ultimately. I would love for beautiful women to realize they’re beautiful. I would love to see them wake up and realize how special they really are and discover what kind of guy they need to find then. They need a guy who also knows they’re beautiful and respects that and doesn’t want to use it.

Ladies. Keep this in mind. You are in the image of God. He made you to be beautiful. Trust that he did so rightly.

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