Frozen

I wrote a bit that was personal in my blog last night and I think I’d like to do the same again. Those who know me know that one thing I do deplore is the singles life and many who know me well say “Why is a guy like you single?” I would say the main answer is that I lack confidence.

So, I’m at work today and I notice an attractive young lady walking around. Immediately, I’m eager to find her. Unfortunately, I miss her and think that it was a sad loss and time to get back to work.

Before too long, she comes up to me and says “Do you have this movie in?” Where I work, we’ve kept them behind the counter so I smile and say “I think we do.” She smiles back. Yep. I’m definitely intrigued.

I go up to the counter and pull out a copy to see her smile again. Very attractive indeed. I ring up the order and she’s still smiling and I’m smiling and I’m looking into her eyes and for a moment I fear I glance away to check on something with the order. In reality though, I ponder it was more likely I was about to burst.

I get her receipt and I’m just still smiling and so is she as if she was holding me captive by her smile and forcing me to do what she was doing. I give her her receipt and she thanks me and heads out the door.

I noticed around that time that I was even sweating a little bit for it is rarely that something like that happens to me. I looked back and thought “Why didn’t you say anything at all? Ask her for her phone number or find out something about her? Anything?!”

Instead, I froze and for a long time, I was kicking myself and honestly, I still am in some ways. Before too long, I was letting this spill over into every other area of my life. Towards the end of the day after reading some, I was feeling a bit better. Still, it was there.

Why do I say this? I want you all to know that sometimes this will happen in ministry as well. There are times that I do get caught off guard and don’t know what to say immediately and only think of it later. (I’m comforted to know I’m not alone as Greg Koukl of STR has described such times as well.)

So what do you do? Listen to your momentary feelings? No. That will only be negative then and don’t be shocked that negative input gives negative results. Instead, I say use it as a chance to get determined. Next time, I’m gonna talk to the girl. Next time, I’ll know what to say to that question.

Any experience can be learned from and it’s best to learn as much as you can from each experience. It’s also good to learn from the experiences of other people. No one is going to bat 100 in any area. We’re all going to make mistakes from time to time.

The choice is ours though whether we will live in them or not.

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