Hello everyone and welcome back to Deeper Waters where we are diving into the ocean of truth. We’ve been discussing this month Autism Awareness Month and I’ve been trying to give an insider’s perspective on the topic as a person who has Asperger’s. Please note I have Asperger’s. I don’t suffer with Asperger’s. There are times that there are difficulties, but overall, my life is good.
Tonight, I’d like to talk about the topic of internalization. This is not the philosophical debate but the simple fact that what we can tend to do with data is to internalize it to an unhealthy extent. Thus, if a friend of mine doesn’t seem to be speaking to me about something and it could have nothing to do with me, I will be thinking about that detail for awhile and thinking “Did I violate some social rule? Why is he not speaking to me?” It could be he didn’t notice me or he’s just tired or any number of reasons, but it will be internalized.
And yes, I will go to the worst possible scenario.
This can make group interactions very difficult since every facet of what happens in the group scenario has to be understood. If something happens at school or church, you can be thinking “Is the professor or the pastor thinking about me when he says that?”
Please note that when I talk about things like this, I am not saying that the behavior is right or wrong. I am simply saying that this is the way that it is. Most of us can think about that way with worrying, and I assure you an Aspie definitely can. When we are worrying, we know that we ought not to worry. We can know at times that we ought not to internalize things, but like the worrying session, we do that.
Thus, for you, what could be a simple and innocuous gesture for the Aspie can become something that requires much analyzation, and analyzation is something that I plan to talk about in this series. Since we don’t understand society many times, we will misunderstand the reason that you who are neurotypical, as we say, do and say certain things.
What’s the solution? For one thing, we can’t live in paranoia. One aspect of this is that if we are struggling with this, we need to get over it. However, we can be helped in this in that Aspies need people who we know can be open to us and able to be approached and be able to say something like “The other day I did this and you did this in response” or “I said this and you said this in response” and then “Can you explain this to me? I’d like to understand.”
Second, be careful to make sure you’re not adding a barrier. How will your actions be interpreted? The first end is on us here to make sure that we are interpreting you right. However, the other end is to further watch the message you’re sending and remember when being around an Aspie, they could be especially sensitive to comments you make.
And of course, forming communication easily will be an important part in reaching that Aspie for Christ. Again, is it not worth it?
We shall continue next time.